Horton Hatches the Egg - by Dr. Seuss

This is one of my favorite Dr. Seuss books. I’ve read this book to my children so often that I can almost recite it by heart. It is well known, but it isn’t the Horton bestseller - that would go to Horton Hears a Who (doesn’t hurt that that one became a TV special).

If you haven’t read Horton Hatches the Egg, a lazy bird (Mayzie) wants a break from tending to her egg, and asks Horton (an elephant) to egg sit. Assuming a short bird-break, the elephant promises to watch the egg. Without giving you the full story, Horton keeps his word.

Why am recommending a children’s book? Like many Dr. Seuss books, there is a grown-up message. Horton goes through many hardships, but keeps his word. In fact, the line that is oft-repeated in the book is:

“I meant what I what I said, and I said what I meant. An elephant’s faithful, one hundred percent.”

Having this mentality and behavior would serve all of us well - at work and at home.

My wife Lori and I liked this message so much that she painted Horton and that phrase in our daughter Kelsey’s room before she was born!

6 Ways to Read More Effectively

Maybe you are a voracious reader. Maybe reading has never been your favorite thing (though if that is the case, you’re probably not reading this!) Either way - whether you read a book a week or struggle to finish one a year - it would be helpful to gain more value from the time you do spend reading.

First, recognize that I’m not talking about reading novels or the classics. Reading those is purely for pleasure, and, for the most part, the suggestions below don’t apply.

But if you are reading to learn something and to make your life better in some way - to improve your professional results, lower your weight, or learn a hobby – these suggestions will make a real difference in the enjoyment and benefits you gain from reading.

Have a goal. When you pick up any nonfiction book you should know why you are going to dive into it. Maybe you are trying to broaden your knowledge, or improve in a very specific way, or solve a problem? You could have a wide variety of reasons for reading something - any any of them are valid. The key is having a goal and recognizing it. Once you set in your mind your purpose for reading, your subconscious mind will help you reach that goal. Keeping a clear goal will keep you from getting lost in a section or spending too much mental energy on the writing style, etc. Give yourself a clear picture of success and consider the book as a tool to reaching that success.

Do a scan. Once you know what you want to get from the book, spend a few minutes looking it over. Read the table of contents. Flip through the sections. Allow your mind to notice the sections or parts that seem to best help you reach your goal. Perhaps you’ll determine that the whole book isn’t ever relevant to your goal. Which leads me to the next point…

Read only what you need. If you’re like me, you grew up with the idea that once you start a book, you finish it. But guess what; sometimes one chapter is all you need. Sometimes the book loses steam and become repetitive after the first few chapters. Sometimes the writing doesn’t speak to you. If you aren’t enjoying it, or benefiting from it, stop reading it. You will become a more effective and efficient reader when you stop feeling the need to finish every book to the last page.

Be active. Reading, like learning, is an active process. And since in this context you are reading to learn, you will gain more by being an active participant in the book. Keep a journal with you. Write in the margins. Use a highlighter. Unless the book belongs to a friend or the library (and if you are reading for learning, I suggest you really do need your own copy) you should feel free to write in it! Ask yourself questions. Agree or disagree with a point. Jot down your own examples to support an idea. In short, when you become actively engaged with the book, you will glean more from it.

Make it yours. Until you begin to own the material and ideas, they still belong to the author. You must own the learning. The best ways to do that are to write about and/or talk about the ideas, concepts, lessons and examples. This may be as simple as sharing parts of what you read with a friend or colleague. It might be writing about it in your journal for private consumption only, or writing about it on a blog to share with the world. If you are sharing it with others, not only do you benefit, but so do they! But even if you are simply taking notes and writing your ideas on a scrap of paper that gets lost, the act of writing is an act of synthesis and learning.

Try it. Remember, the book is a tool to help you reach a goal. Once the book has aided you in that journey, you must take the most important step. You must take action! Try what you read. Apply it in some way. That could mean using that new technique, starting on the prescribed diet or buying the necessary items for the new hobby. To get the ultimate value from the book, you must write your own chapters with your actions.

These are all actions that I take as a reader. They have made a difference in my life and in my results. They can make a difference for you as well. Regardless of what, how much or how often you read try these suggestions and you will be pleased with the results.

Potential Pointer: Reading is an important life skill. No matter how often you read, you need strategies to gain the most from your reading experience. You must have a goal for your reading and engage yourself with the book to maximize the benefit you gain from the time spent reading.

What To Communicate

Leaders know that communication is one of their most important jobs. Often I find leaders who know this and yet don’t do it nearly enough. At the heart of this knowledge and skills gap is a critical question.

What do I need to communicate?

Often leaders say, “I’ve already told them that, sent the email, gave the presentation.” While this may be true, not only do these communications need to be repeated, but often what is being communicated is the wrong thing, or at the wrong time.

Here is a simple rule of thumb:

Communicate why before how, and don’t switch too soon.

In most organizations and teams the “why” is missing. When the why is strong enough, the how will be figured out. Besides, if you are trying to empower your organization, as a leader you probably need to spend less time on how anyway.

Focus more of your communication and conversation on why and less on how.

Also posted on Leadership.

What Bold Thing…

Sue Melone, writer of the Boldtrek blog and I chatted on the phone last week. She opened our conversation with a question. If you have read this blog for any time at all, you know I love great questions. She asked one of the best:

“What bold thing have you done this week?”

You know a great question, because even when you know the answer, you pause.

I paused.

We talked about variations of this question that she uses in different situations:

What bold thing will you do today?

What bold thing have you done this year?

What bold thing will you do this year?

… you get the idea.

But I hope you do more than get the idea…. I hope you will answer the question.

What bold thing will you do this week?

Or, to Kevin-ize it…

What remarkable thing will you do this week?

Take your pick - they are both questions we could benefit from answering (and acting on) regularly.

Also posted in Creativity, Leadership and Learning.

At The Heart Of Great Listening

I could start this article extolling the importance of listening in our everyday lives, in our ability to lead others, in our ability to improve relationships and communications in general. I could lament that while throughout our school experiences we were taught the communication skills of writing and speaking, but seldom was any time spent learning the skills of listening.

I could do those things, but I won’t.

You’ve heard and said all of those things before. There is no value in me going over that litany again. Besides, if we had all bought into those arguments, we’d be walking around as better listeners. Sadly, for most of us, most of the time, this isn’t true.

That chorus of comments assumes or implies that the heart of great listening is skills.
I don’t agree.

Don’t get me wrong, I believe the skills of great listening are important, I just don’t think that is our problem. We know how to listen; we’ve exhibited the skills at some points I our lives. We just don’t do it nearly often enough.

So, if it isn’t skill that keeps us from consistent great listening, what is it? I believe there are three factors: Intention, Attention, and Effort. Let me explain.

Intention

When you begin communicating with someone your intention, conscious or subconscious, will directly impact how you listen. Consider this short list of possible intentions:

• You want to persuade the other person.
• You want your point of view heard.
• You want to get through this conversation as quickly as possible.
• You want to build the relationship.
• You want the person to like you (more).
• You want to “set them straight”.
• You want to give them some feedback or coaching.

I could expand this list, but this is enough to make my point. Your intention at the beginning of the conversation will have an impact on how completely and carefully you listen during the conversation.

Want to be a better listener instantly? Set your intention on the other person instead of yourself. Intend to understand their message. Or, to be more blunt:

Stop being so selfish.

Great listening is an act of caring, of service and, yes, of love.

Make the conversation about the other person; desire to understand their perspective, ideas and thoughts. With this intention your mental mandate is no longer muddy and you will listen more effectively.

Attention

In every communication encounter we make a choice - subconsciously or consciously. The choice is whether or not we are going to pay attention. This is separate from our intention; however, they are closely linked. The reason I separate them is that even if our intention isn’t crystal clear, we can make a choice in the moment to pay attention.

However, when our intention is clearly focused on the other person, it is much easier to make this choice. In fact, the best way to make the attention choice a habit is to get our intention in our communications more clearly set.

There are two parts to our attention in a listening situation and they are both important - attention to the person (which intention helps with significantly) and attention to the topic.
In short, get interested in both!

When you do you allow your listening skills to improve.

Effort

Listening is hard. We have to put our interests aside for the moment. We have to fight through our thoughts, unclear word choices, a million distractions.

It takes effort.

And it isn’t a passive activity when done well - it requires energy and engagement and thought. It isn’t a fluke that great listening is often called active listening. Great listening is an active, participatory process.

To do it well, we must work at it.

It is really just this simple. If you want to improve your listening effectiveness, don’t ignore the active listening skills of paraphrasing, making eye contact and more; just don’t start there.
Start with your intention and purpose for listening, continue by resolving to place your full attention on the other person, and based on those two factors, make the effort.

We all know the fruits of listening more effectively are many. Intention, Attention and Effort will give you a roadmap for success.

 

“What Habit Will I Alter Or Eliminate?”

Kevin Eikenberry asks a new set of challenging questions designed to help you make 2008 a great year!

What Habit Will I Alter or Eliminate?

By Kevin Eikenberry

This is the tenth post in a continuing series designed to help you create a great 2008 - using questions to reflect on last year, and project into the future. All of the questions and additional information can be found in this tool, available for you to download now.

The tenth question is:

What habit will I alter or eliminate?

This is a close cousin to question #9, and your answer may be even more powerful.

I have several habits I’d like to alter. Here are three examples:

• I’d like to refrain from turning the television on without knowing what I am going to watch.
• I’d like to discipline myself spend the last half hour of every day reading something uplifting and educational.
• I’d like eliminate language or comments that could be seen as hurtful or mean to others - even if they are truly meant in jest.

While I am going to work on all of them, the first one - only turning the TV on when I know what I am going to watch is going to be my focus. Studies show American adults watch an average of four hours of TV per day (see here), and while I enjoy some television I don’t nearly approach that on average (though some football Saturdays, Sundays and college basketball tournament time days head that direction!), I do find times when I seem to binge, or don’t turn the set off.

For me the culprit is the times I just turn it on and surf. In these cases I’m not choosing to sit and watch with part of my family, and I don’t have a particular program that I want to see. The reality of these situations is that when I turn the set on in these times I am procrastinating, and therefore actively (by turning on the set) moving away from my goals.

I do enjoy TV and don’t want to banish from my house (I’d even like a new one on my wall), but I do want to manage it more effectively. Altering this habit will, for me make me happier, healthier and feel better about my results every day.

What more could we ask from a habit?

Think about this question, answer it, and take action. It is one more way to make your 2008 great!

Also posted in Leadership, Learning and Training.

“What New Habit Will I Create?”

Kevin Eikenberry asks a new set of challenging questions designed to help you make 2008 a great year!

What New Habit Will I Create?

By Kevin Eikenberry

This is the ninth post in a continuing series designed to help you create a great 2008 - using questions to reflect on last year, and project into the future. All of the questions and additional information can be found in this tool, available for you to download now.

The ninth question is:

What new habit will I create?

I plan to strengthen habits related to building and deepening relationships.

Included in this area are:

- sending more (and more timely) thank you notes.
- intentionally connecting more often - with colleagues, clients and other cool people.
- making time for friends, creating meaningful memories and conversations.

The key to making these happen is to take action. I have been and will be taking these actions, and along with making for more enjoyable conversations, it will also support me in reaching my other goals for the year.

Pretty good returns for some new habits.

What habits will create those kinds of returns for you? What new habit will you create?

I hope you will choose to share your answers in the comments to this post.

Also posted in Leadership, Learning and Training.

“What Relationship Do You Most Want To Develop?”

Kevin Eikenberry asks a new set of challenging questions designed to help you make 2008 a great year!

What Relationship Do You Most Want to Develop?

By Kevin Eikenberry

This is the eighth post in a continuing series designed to help you create a great 2008 - using questions to reflect on last year, and project into the future. All of the questions and additional information can be found in this tool, available for you to download now.

The eighth question is:

What relationship(s) do I most want to develop?

While there are many relationships I want to deepen and develop, including some from my post to the last question, this question begs focus. And while I won’t pick one person, I’ll pick just three:

Lori - my wonderful wife
Parker - my quickly maturing 15 year old son
Kelsey - my beautiful 9 year old daughter

While there are many relationships that are important to me, none compare to these three. Whatever goals I have set, whatever plans I have made - and you have some sense of those if you have been following these posts - none of those matter if I don’t have the most important people to me, ever closer to me.

More than the achievement of any other goals, accomplishing this will bring me success happiness and joy.

Several of the past projection questions have been inwardly focused. This one and some of those to come will be less so. I encourage you to consider this question, as well as the logical follow-up of “How are you going to deepen those relationship(s)?”

As with all of these questions, I welcome your comments and answers.

Also posted in Leadership, Learning and Training.

“Who Do I Want To Meet?”

 
Kevin Eikenberry asks a new set of challenging questions designed to help you make 2008 a great year!

Who Do I Want to Meet?

By Kevin Eikenberry

This is the seventh post in a continuing series designed to help you create a great 2008 - using questions to reflect on last year, and project into the future. All of the questions and additional information can be found in this tool, available for you to download now.

The seventh question is:

Who do I want to meet?

Oooh, I love this question!

I have a long list of people that I want to meet. Some are people that I already “know” from online and phone conversations, but that I look forward to meeting. People like:

• Mike Robbins
• Jonathan Farrington
• Jon Gordon
• Rosa Say
• Kevin Hogan
• Dave Lakani
• Bob Burg
• David Zinger
• Mollie Marti
• Daniel Decker

(This is a partial list!)

I also am looking forward to meeting large groups of John Deere dealers (which I will do in sessions over the next couple of weeks), many new Clients and participants, all of those who are our partners in promoting Remarkable Leadership, and many other members of the Top Sales Experts group.

I also have a long list of “famous” people I would like to meet for a variety of reasons. I wasn’t going to share this list, but I decided that by sharing these names I may be improving my chances of meeting them. (Who knows, maybe they, a family member, or colleague will read this - or maybe you know these people!)

Here is part of that list:

- All of the former Presidents
- Oprah (ok, so I want be more than meet her, I want to be a guest on her show!)
- Vince Gill (and while we are at it, my wife would like to meet his wife, Amy Grant)
- Garth Brooks
- Seth Godin
- Larry King
- Warren Bennis
- Patrick Lencioni
- Tony Dungy
- Jimmy Buffett
- Warren Buffett
- Joe Vitale
- Mark Joyner
- Michael Masterson

I want to meet these people for a variety of reasons, but the one reason that is in common is to learn from them. I admire all of these people in one or more ways and I believe that in meeting them I could learn more than I could from afar.

I encourage you to ask yourself this question and think big - not only those people who you “know” you will meet (like, in my case future participants and Clients), but also build a list of those that might be a bit more of a stretch.

One of the things that answering this question (on paper) does for me is that it helps me realize that making this happen in many cases is easier than I might first think. Even in reviewing this list to write this post I am energized by the connections and network that I already have that can help make some of these meetings.

Of course, I am open to your introductions to any of these people as well!

So, again, let me ask you - who do you want to meet (this year)?

As with all of these questions, I welcome your comments and answers.

Also posted in Leadership, Learning and Training.

“What Will I Learn?”

Kevin Eikenberry asks a new set of challenging questions designed to help you make 2008 a great year!

What Will I Learn?

By Kevin Eikenberry

This is the sixth post in a continuing series designed to help you create a great 2008 - using questions to reflect on last year, and project into the future. All of the questions and additional information can be found in this tool, available for you to download now.

The sixth question is:

What will I learn?

I believe this question is extremely powerful because it makes us intentional and conscious as learners. In many ways this is the necessary follow-up question to the second in this series - What are my goals?

Why?

Because when we set goals by definition identifying gaps in our knowledge.

In my experience most goals require more than just time or other resources - they also require that we learn some things! So if you have been following this thread and (hopefully) answering these questions for yourself, go back to question 2 and start there in creating your learning list for 2008.

My list for 2008 includes:

- How to use and extend Web 2.0 tools for the benefit of our clients - current and future.
- How create and tell stories more effectively.
- Write to elicit more emotion from the reader.
- implement ideas with greater speed.
- ways to collaborate more effectively.

As with many of these questions, I haven’t shared my full list, but rather a sampling. If you are also interested in learning these things, or if you may be able to help me as a mentor, coach, or teacher, let me know - I am VERY open to learning these things in any way that I can!

As with all of these questions, I welcome your comments and answers.

Also posted in Leadership, Learning and Training.

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